Unexpected Tears

Something unexpected happened yesterday.

Last week I was accepted in a new school, an international school and I have to be a full-time teacher there. I was only planning to find a part-time teacher job as I am currently already teaching in a pharmacy school. But the new school has no part-time teacher policy…all teachers have to be a full-timer. When they don’t have class to teach they still have to stay at school doing whatever teachers should do.

They also appointed me to upgrade the laboratory to fit high school quality. This new school will open class for high school on July (new school year). The already have kindergarten, elementary and junior high.

Getting accepted there means I have to say good bye to my students in pharmacy high school.

Yesterday, I told the eleventh graders (I am their home room teacher) that I won’t be teaching there again next school year. I told them that it’s a hard decision but let’s be reasonable, I can’t afford my life with the salary from this school as I have quit from my other job. (my other job)

Maybe it doesn’t sound professional telling them I am leaving because of the salary…but I have to tell them the truth because my leaving is not because of themย  at all.

I didn’t expect to see any of them to start crying because of my announcement, I know they will be sad…but not crying.

The eleventh graders are the students who got scolded by me more than other students. I remember when they were still in tenth grade, they were so noisy when I told them to do some exercise, their level of noisiness got really worst and I slammed the whiteboard with my hand so hard to get their attention. With scary face, I told them cynically,ย  ‘Is this a school or a traditional market? I told you to answer the questions, you use your brain and your hands to do that NOT your mouth!!

On other occasion, I hit the table to shush them up. I even sent 2 students out of my class as they kept talking while I was explaining. I told another “Hey, Do you want me to throw your mobile phone away? You were shouting so loud that you don’t understand and when I explain it again the rest of the class pays attention but you! As if you’re going to understand with that phone on your hand!” Trust me, when I said that I look like a witch!

They even call me Killer Teacher.

However, no matter how often I got angry with them, I always smile and laugh with them afterward because for me, scolding them is necessary at certain time but not all the time. The eleventh graders are uncontrollable sometimes, that’s what other teachers said…but they are always controllable in my class.

After all I did, being all cheerful and scary at the same time…I was so moved when some of them cried knowing I will leave them soon. It was really unexpected.

Even though I started telling them no one will shout at you anymore now, cheer up…they still cried. They told me that they know I scold them because I care for them.

I always love my students, leaving them for a new school is always heartbreaking and I have left many school for many reasons.

I am so sorry kids, I am caught between my love toward my students and my daily need. I will never forget you.

Borrowed from desicomments.com
Borrowed from desicomments.com

38 thoughts on “Unexpected Tears

  1. Ah, Nov, farewell is alwalys a bittersweet experience, isn’t it? I hope you will be happy in your new school :-).

  2. It is always difficult for students and teachers alike when everything has to change, and I am not surprised that you have impacted on their lives, you are a caring and very good teacher and this reflects their unhappiness at you leaving but for you this is something necessary in order to better your life and you are right, the extra salary will be much better for you ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thank you for sharing your story with us Miss. Novia but don’t worry the children will soon adapt to their new teacher and now it is your turn to fit in with the new students ๐Ÿ™‚ I like the ‘Witch’ reference but I will think of you as the nice witch, and one very good teacher indeed ๐Ÿ™‚ Be well my great friend and enjoy your new teaching assignment, it sounds exciting and a little scary to me ๐Ÿ™‚ lol

    Andro xxxx

    1. Sometimes I wish I was born rich, that way I don’t have to care about paying the bills and just teach wherever I want.

      I am happy that somehow I have got through them and made them eager to study difficult subject like chemistry…it warms my heart to know that.

      Yeah I know what you mean by scary…we never knew whether the new place will better or worst than the old place, but I am challenged and hope for the best.

      Thank you Andro ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Seven or eight years ago I also left a High School teaching job which was parttime for a full time one in a private school, but I stayed friends with most of my students there who are now grown up people and have me on their Facebooks ๐Ÿ™‚ But I left teaching and have been in publishing business for six years now.

    1. I always stay friends with my students ๐Ÿ™‚ They are still calling me miss even though we went out to watch movie together. I even dare to say that some of them have become a good friend of mine.
      I don’t think I will ever leave teaching. My other dream is to be a writer but even if I finally published my book I am still going to teach, it’s fun watching my students grow.

  4. While it is a good thing to have that new job to help you with money, I am at least glad that your students understand and that they know how much you truly cared for them and their studies. They will continue to do well because you have given them that discipline to be the best they can and I know they will appreciate and remember their time with you.

    Plus… this will give you the chance to meet another new group of children to help and guide to their goals. I hope they will come to be good students and good friends for you in the years to come as well. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Thank you, Miyuki ๐Ÿ™‚
      I sure hope they will remember everything I have taught them and hope they will never forget me…though teachers often forget students names over the years ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Honestly, I am excited about the new students, there will be great challenge to teach them because I know how international kids behave.

  5. Hey, first of all, congrats on your new job Nov! It’s too bad you have to say goodbye to your students but I’m sure they’d understand and be happy for you. I think they know you care about them and you can still keep in touch too after you leave. So where is your new job? Is it at JIS (Jkt Int’l School)? That’s cool that they want you to update the lab, etc. Well done Nov, best of luck in your new venture!

    1. Thank you Ruth ๐Ÿ™‚
      I know, saying good bye to students always not fun…but they can always contact me just like all my previous students. Some of them have turned to a close friend ๐Ÿ™‚

      Not JIS, there are many international school in Jakarta now. It’s Aljabr International School, an Islamic based school. The students in private international school are usually tougher than normal school, it’s going to be a real challenge to teach them.

      Thank you again, Ruth…I hope I can do better there ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Congratulations on your new job, Novroz! I’m very happy for you. I know you’ll do well there.

    I think it’s a testament to your abilities as a teacher that your current students would cry upon hearing that you’re leaving them. That must be difficult for you, too, but as you said, you have to do what will be best for you and your career in the long term.

    I find it hard to imagine you yelling at them and getting upset with them!

    1. Thank you, peter ๐Ÿ™‚

      I guess it’s a good testament then. Especially when it came from the class I often scolded. it’s always nice to know that they understood me and didn’t hate me for that.

      Hahaha…I am pretty cheerful, most of the time, it gave quite a shock to them too when I first yelled in their class. The first grade said that I was really scary and hate to see me get angry at them again ๐Ÿ˜‰

  7. I can’t imagine you angry! Killer Teacher? You did the right thing being honest and they know you cared. Good luck in your new job. It sounds very important. You can do it.

    1. Well…I am cheerful most of the time but as the saying here in my country, cheerful person is scarier than grumpy people once she/he is angry ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Thank you, Jason ๐Ÿ™‚ I will try my best on my new school

  8. Lovely post, Novia. A happy and a sad moment at the same time.
    I’m sure all of your students always love you. You’re kind and intelligent and have great passion.
    I was watching the movie October Sky yesterday and it showed how much impact a great teacher can have. have you seen it? i could imagine you’d like it. It’s very moving and a true story.
    All the best in your new school.

    1. Thank you Caroline ๐Ÿ™‚
      Thank you for the recommendation. I haven’t seen it yet but i will try to find it…some movies are difficult to find ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
      Thank you, I will try to do my best there.

  9. Congrats for your new job, Novia ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope the new workplace will be as you expected. It seems you’re quite feared but loved there. That’s actually pretty awesome, you’re quite a memorable teacher, then. I’m sure they’ll remember you for years. I sometimes remember my favorite teacher until now.

    1. Thank you, Andina ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope so too.

      I always try to balance strictness and fun, I guess that’s why they still like me though I often scolded them.

      Me too…I have once written about teachers I like in high school

  10. Well, being a ‘killer teacher’ is actually will be more memorable, Miss. One of the things I remember most about the time you were still a teacher in 28 is your reputation of being strict, esp in exam weeks, lol. But I know you do that because you care about your students (and you are only a ‘killer teacher’ when the students themselves are hard to control :p) Outside of the class, I think you’re one of the coolest teachers ever haha too bad that I didn’t really have the chance to be taught by you. Anyway, congrats on your new job!

    1. Huahaha that reputation made me hated by your class ๐Ÿ˜‰ I know pretty well that some of you hated me so much because I have never taught your class…All the classes I have taught were okay with my strictness because they knew me.

      Yeah…too bad the program was terminated at your time. It was fun teaching 28, the kids are all nice and fun to teach. And if I ever taught your class, I bet we will talk about movies all the time just like I always talk about One Piece with some students in class of 2008 ๐Ÿ˜‰
      Thank you, Fariz ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. Your leaving that school is another life lesson for the class. That is how to cope with losing something they value. Some may have experienced that already and most will experience that in the future. I still remember some of my teachers from over sixty years ago as I learned so many life lessons from them. In addition you have learned something too.

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